Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas

tags: writer's block

I hope everyone can get used to seeing me happy. It's been awhile.

So, you should probably read His Majesty's Dragon and the other Temeraire books by naominovik. They are really really good.

But you don't have to have read them to know that this art I made for her fanart contest is completely awesome.



IN CONCLUSION I RULE YOU GUYS.

I became a lot more happy and comfortable with myself once I stopped trying not to be intimidating.

I'm not sure how exactly I am so scary to people (I am such a tiny wee thing, I do not even know) but it recently became obvious that I intimidate people even if I am actively trying not to. I don't scare everybody, obviously, but the people who are most likely to attribute malice to my most neutral actions are going to do so no matter how much I reassure them that I am actually pretty nice, seriously.

Taking that burden off myself feels pretty good! Some people are going to get the wrong impression of me, no matter what I do; clearly that means I don't have to bother trying to please them. In trying to be docile and agreeable, I still didn't please anyone who might have approved of that, and also I failed to please people who are/would be totally comfortable with my self-confident and menacing side. CONCLUSION: Not being myself in order to be acceptable to others is a lose/lose situation!

I could go on, but really that's the whole point here. It's kind of a duh, but I had to be reminded, and I know there are others who could stand to hear it.

SOME PEOPLE WILL NOT LIKE YOU. THEY WILL NEVER LIKE YOU. IT DOES NOT MATTER WHAT YOU DO. THERE IS NO REASON, THEREFORE, TO WORRY ABOUT THIS; YOU CANNOT DO THE WRONG THING BECAUSE THERE IS NO RIGHT THING TO THEM. THE RIGHT THING IS TO BE AS AWESOME AS YOU KNOW HOW TO BE.

Go forth and kick all the asses.

Today, I realized that my jeans were getting kind of worn. Moreover, I felt like getting new ones. Who the hell ever feels like shopping for jeans? That is the worst thing to shop for. But, so long as it actually sounded like a good idea, I decided to run with it, because what the hell.

And then I went to the mall and tried on one pair and they were perfect and also on sale. And by "perfect" I mean "no seriously, they are comfy and look good and exactly the right length." I don't even have to cuff them. I do not remember the last time I wore jeans uncuffed, but probably I was treading on them constantly anyway.

The conclusion to be had here is that my spontaneous whims are actually me sensing the future subconsciously. And the future in this case contained jeans.